TidyKidz » time to clean

It’s All In Your Head

admin — Wed, 05 Aug 2009 03:22:59 +0000

Well most of it is anyway!

Here’s the situation. You’ve worked hard all week, everyone is still alive and healthy, the bills are paid (or will be), and now it’s time to ~~~CLEAN THE HOUSE.~~~ No matter what the kids ages are (although older is tougher), you DREAD in the most intense of ways even uttering the words, “Ok kids, let’s clean up the house and get the chores done,” or whatever your method is for delivering the perceived death sentence. I hear this dread from parents all the time and I understand because it was the worst thing my Mom could say to me when I was a kid… instantly turning this Saturday morning soccer star into a fit throwing, convulsing, whining, death welcoming little pile of tears and grunts, and sent me stomping off to my room mumbling something about how I was going to die and cleaning is soooooo boring!

Tell me she didn't just say what I think she said!

No one wants to start their weekends off with that kind of drama but it keeps happening… and for some, the weekend doesn’t even start until that drama-sode is over! How sad is that? Well, here are some things to think about to help you muster up the energy and courage to embark on your next quest for a cleaner, tidier household and stop the next round of stomach virus sharing

1) Congrats! – You deserve an award for even asking your family to help with the keeping of the castle! You have already saved yourself from the wrongs of just doing it all yourself because “you want it done right and as quickly as possible.” So here’s your trophy

Winner!

2) Whether you’re getting much help with cleaning or not, deep down there is a feeling of guilt. That guilt stems from the idea that you should be doing more for your family and you really should be doing a better job of keeping the house clean and beautiful. You may even go so far as to think you’re wrong to expect help. That’s all in your head…SCRAP IT! Your family will pick up on that and you will not be able to approach the subject with the level of confidence necessary to solicit the help you need, hence… increased drama!

3) You are teaching your kids so much more than how to clean! This is teamwork! You’re teaching them team building skills, social skills, communication, good hygiene, time management, organization, respect….it’s practically endless. You are helping them build habits that will serve them well the rest of their days on this planet… you are being a great parent!!!

Success

So, the next time you get ready to announce the castle cleaning, smile and think of it this way… it’s not so much about the cleaning, really. Focus on the end result… GOOD HABITS taught by you, the GREAT Parent! You’re kids may start to realize it’s not really that big of a deal and the more they do it the faster they get and the less they have to think about it. REALITY BONUS: They might even realize that keeping up with things a little better during the week makes cleaning day wayyy easier! Triumph!

REMEMBER: You are a GREAT PARENT and the drama is all in their heads… not yours!

TKMom

There’s A Spouse In The House!

admin — Mon, 13 Jul 2009 00:09:14 +0000

Opposites attract right? You are the super Neat-Freak and your partner is straight out of an episode of Sanford and Son. It’s enough to cause some serious disagreements and not to mention some confusion from the kid’s perspectives. There is no doubt that clutter can cause people to feel an enormous amount of stress and anxiety the minute they walk into a room. Others simply say it doesn’t bother them and they hardly notice it. At times, it seems it would be easier to climb Mount Everest than it would be to explain to someone unbothered by clutter, how stressful clutter is to you.

Honey, I'm home!!!

I know you want the magic solution. Just do ____________ and you’re ” not so tidy” significant other will be buzzing around the house scrubbing, vacuuming, dusting, disinfecting, sorting and folding. Buy ___________ and never again will you come home from a short trip to a complete and total disaster area fit for yellow caution tape and a sign labeled “CONDEMNED.”

Well, there is no magic answer but I’d like to offer a few suggestions on how to approach the subject with your cave dwelling partner without getting into a knock down drag out. One thing you may want to keep in mind if you are the Neat Freak (odds are the Messy Marvin’s aren’t reading this…just a guess) and that is PATIENCE… Rome was not cleaned in a day!

It’s very important to express to your partner how clutter makes you feel. Take the time to sit down when you will be uninterrupted and explain how important it is to you that things don’t just pile up around the house. Be very specific, such as “When you leave your clothes on the floor all week and let the papers pile up on the dresser it makes me feel stressed just walking into our bedroom, a place where I prefer to be able to relax and rest.” Give specific examples and explain that you have a hard time resting in a room that is not picked up… you have that nagging feeling there is still something left for you to do.
Quite often, the problem is that Messy Marvin’s have never really learned how to be organized and maintain clutter free surroundings (too bad they didn’t have Tidy Kidz). It’s a great idea to take the time to help them or even surprise them with a new system for keeping control of their stuff. If you think you can get along well enough… make it a date… order out and share a glass of wine or two… play their favorite music (think strategically) . Purchase a filing cabinet and label it just for their things, put a paper stacker on their desk and buy a trash can for the office. Show them where everything goes in a spirit of respect. This will be a nice change from the usual nagging.
Start a plan with your spouse and agree that each of you will spend 5 minutes each night straightening up areas that each of you primarily use. Express how much it would mean to you. This will also set a great example for your kids who you are asking to do the same. The 5 Minute Tidy Game (watch the video) can be played by everyone and to be honest, the more the merrier, when you include everyone it can actually be fun!

Common ground

The important thing is to make sure you have expressed how you feel about the clutter and your spouse has, at minimum, expressed they have heard what you’ve said and at least will try and understand how it makes you feel. That is a huge step in the right direction. Things may not change overnight but you can make progress and it’s not unusual for the whole family to begin to realize that tidiness is next to… well, you know

Imagine!

One step at a time… believe it and you will get there!

TKMom

Timed Clean Up: Make It A Game

admin — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 21:39:40 +0000

Make a set time for cleaning up a room is a great way to keep them moving. If you’re going to be heading out the door soon, a 2-Minute Tidy may be just enough to get a few things put away quickly. A 5 or 10 Minute Tidy would usually be enough to clean up a bedroom or playroom but gives the child a definite ending for the task that they can see. Use a timer they can see in the room they are cleaning and make it like a game. Setting a reward (see Marble System) for accomplishing the goal in the time allowed is a great motivator.

You can even have a 30 min or 60 min Tidy for the whole house and involve the whole family. This allows the parents to set a good example and let the kids see that they aren’t the only ones with chores. Turn on some music and make it fun. Give the heavy and high chores to parents or older siblings and assign age appropriate tasks to the kiddos. They can dust, dust mop, vacuum and pick up the various toys, books, video games and other clutter that accumulates during the week, even if they aren’t the ones who left it out. What a concept! A reward for the whole family like a trip to the park, the movies, or a favorite lunch spot will help keep the focus for the Tidy Hour.