TidyKidz » bedroom

There’s A Spouse In The House!

admin — Mon, 13 Jul 2009 00:09:14 +0000

Opposites attract right? You are the super Neat-Freak and your partner is straight out of an episode of Sanford and Son. It’s enough to cause some serious disagreements and not to mention some confusion from the kid’s perspectives. There is no doubt that clutter can cause people to feel an enormous amount of stress and anxiety the minute they walk into a room. Others simply say it doesn’t bother them and they hardly notice it. At times, it seems it would be easier to climb Mount Everest than it would be to explain to someone unbothered by clutter, how stressful clutter is to you.

Honey, I'm home!!!

I know you want the magic solution. Just do ____________ and you’re ” not so tidy” significant other will be buzzing around the house scrubbing, vacuuming, dusting, disinfecting, sorting and folding. Buy ___________ and never again will you come home from a short trip to a complete and total disaster area fit for yellow caution tape and a sign labeled “CONDEMNED.”

Well, there is no magic answer but I’d like to offer a few suggestions on how to approach the subject with your cave dwelling partner without getting into a knock down drag out. One thing you may want to keep in mind if you are the Neat Freak (odds are the Messy Marvin’s aren’t reading this…just a guess) and that is PATIENCE… Rome was not cleaned in a day!

It’s very important to express to your partner how clutter makes you feel. Take the time to sit down when you will be uninterrupted and explain how important it is to you that things don’t just pile up around the house. Be very specific, such as “When you leave your clothes on the floor all week and let the papers pile up on the dresser it makes me feel stressed just walking into our bedroom, a place where I prefer to be able to relax and rest.” Give specific examples and explain that you have a hard time resting in a room that is not picked up… you have that nagging feeling there is still something left for you to do.
Quite often, the problem is that Messy Marvin’s have never really learned how to be organized and maintain clutter free surroundings (too bad they didn’t have Tidy Kidz). It’s a great idea to take the time to help them or even surprise them with a new system for keeping control of their stuff. If you think you can get along well enough… make it a date… order out and share a glass of wine or two… play their favorite music (think strategically) . Purchase a filing cabinet and label it just for their things, put a paper stacker on their desk and buy a trash can for the office. Show them where everything goes in a spirit of respect. This will be a nice change from the usual nagging.
Start a plan with your spouse and agree that each of you will spend 5 minutes each night straightening up areas that each of you primarily use. Express how much it would mean to you. This will also set a great example for your kids who you are asking to do the same. The 5 Minute Tidy Game (watch the video) can be played by everyone and to be honest, the more the merrier, when you include everyone it can actually be fun!

Common ground

The important thing is to make sure you have expressed how you feel about the clutter and your spouse has, at minimum, expressed they have heard what you’ve said and at least will try and understand how it makes you feel. That is a huge step in the right direction. Things may not change overnight but you can make progress and it’s not unusual for the whole family to begin to realize that tidiness is next to… well, you know

Imagine!

One step at a time… believe it and you will get there!

TKMom

Pajamas Go Under The Pillow

admin — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 15:12:06 +0000

Tornados, Cyclones, and Banishment!

admin — Sat, 09 May 2009 04:37:01 +0000

Someone recently asked, “When do kids finally start to appreciate life not being a complete disaster area?” Well, honestly, some kids may never get there but I believe that to be a select few. For most, appreciating a well kept room, good hygiene and organized belongings takes time. There are those who are just born with it where others have to be taught, encouraged and in some cases threatened with banishment from the kingdom (just kidding).

We have 3 kids and they cover the full spectrum from Mighty Tidy to Tornado. The little one (girl) is an absolute wiz at tidy, and let me tell you, she has taught us all a thing or two. The oldest, also a girl, reminds me of a phrase my parents used quite often when referring to my organizational skills, “You’d lose your head if it wasn’t attached to your shoulders.” And then there is the middle child (boy), who will clean up his room but then it’s sectioned off like a museum so nothing gets move from its sacred spot. I find myself creeping tip toe through his room so as not to knock over one of his very deliberately placed toys. These are, after all, very strategically placed and trust me he’ll notice if Mr. Bionicle™ has moved to a vulnerable position against the great Bakugan™ foe… it’s a battle of epic proportion!

We run the gamut from, the total standoff… “clean up or perish”, to “oh the heck with it, my room is a mess too and I’m tired”!!!

Regardless if you’re dealing with kids who take to it instinctively or those who fight it every step of the way, breaking tasks down into smaller “bite size” chunks is a vital step towards success. For example, if you have a child who’s room looks like a cyclone hit it and the mere mention of the words “clean up your room” turn your once sweet, good natured child into a convulsing, melt down having, professional whiner who you begin to refer to as your husband’s (or wife’s) child….here is a suggestion that will help.

Day one: start with making the bed only.

Day two: make the bed and pick up 5 things off of the floor.

Day three: make the bed, 5 more things off the floor and 5 items to be thrown away or donated to charity. (you can make it 3 things if 5 starts to point you towards whiner territory)

Day four: make the bed, 5 things off the floor and 5 items to be trashed, stored or donated… starting to get the idea??? When these tasks are being completed, let your kids dress up in play clothes or listen to fun music… anything to promote a little use of the imagination.

A cyclone is just too overwhelming a task to think of cleaning up all at once. If you can live with the mess for a few more days and let them make smaller strides towards cleaning it up… you will have truly accomplished something and so will they!

TKMom